When relationship struggles and conflicts arise, it can be so troubling. Often, we don’t see problems coming, and then bam… discord. One person sees things one way, and you see them another. Who is right? It doesn’t really matter.

What matters is that we can work together in peace and unity as God asks of us.

“I plead with Euodia and I plead with Syntyche to agree with each other in the Lord.” Philippians 4:2

Euodia and Syntyche had been workers for Christ in the church at Phillipi. Their broken relationship was no small matter. Their united efforts at the beginning led many to come to faith in Christ. But somewhere along the line, there was conflict, and Paul was urging them to reconcile.

Paul lays a foundation for how we should live in his letter to the Roman church, stating that love should be sincere, that we should live in harmony with one another, and that we should not repay anyone evil for evil. (Romans 12:9, 16, 17)

And the verse that I repeatedly come back to, “If it is possible, as much as depends on you, live peaceably with all men.” Romans 12:18.

It’s so much easier said than done.

I think every one of us has been here. Whether in the workplace, with a friend or family member, or in ministry, we all have experienced situations with people that perhaps started out stable, then went south.

Oh, the drama and the tension of it all.

But Paul is holding up a standard of leadership to follow. We can choose to walk in radical obedience to Christ, with His mindset, and take responsibility for our own actions. Or we can give in to our prideful ways and walk according to our flesh.

We can’t always control the outcomes, but we can control how we respond by making every effort to reconcile. We can pursue peace by attempting to reason together (Isaiah 1:18).

When reasoning together doesn’t produce a solution, and it’s clear the relationship is at a crossroads, the Lord will sometimes lead us to move on.

Such was the case with Paul and Barnabas. In Acts 15, Barnabas wanted to take Mark with them on their next journey, but Paul disagreed because Mark had deserted them on a previous missionary endeavor.

“They had such a sharp disagreement that they parted company.” Acts 15: 39.

Barnabas took Mark and went to Cyprus, but Paul chose Silas and went through Syria and Cilicia.

God works even through conflict and disagreements. These two great preachers formed two teams and spread the gospel in different regions.

Christians don’t always have to agree- God will have His way and accomplish His perfect plan even through tense relational issues.

But the point is how we respond when struggles with others arise. Do we model Christ-like love and humbly try to work peaceably through disagreements? If this is an area we wrestle with, then we can ask the Lord to fill us with more of His Spirit and give us the ability to love others and walk in wisdom.

Is there a relationship in your life that needs reconciliation? Seek the Lord for counsel, then step forward to try to make amends.